My Life is Not Fiction ✮
Self-fulfillment through validation is a never-ending cycle! I think that it is time that I be real with myself and the way that I feel. Whether that be how I feel about others or about me. I feel like I get myself in completely avoidable situations due to boredom. I do it based on convivence and not on logic, and that has done nothing but have negative effects. I feel like chasing a feeling that I held the first time I experienced love in the 10th grade has led me to be in unfavorable situations. I don't even think I'd call that love but I was convinced enough. It was close enough to make me feel devoted and to feel heartbroken when it didn't work out. It was enough to, again, still chase that same feeling this many years later. That version of me is gone and so is he but I still feel nostalgic about it. I fear that I'm using that as another excuse though. That it is another one of my avoidant tendencies and that telling myself that I'm chasing a feeling that'l...
